Alex Foster chapter 13

Fuck. What the hell was wrong with Nika? Maybe I didn`t have the right to even think about it, but the situation was weird and made me feel anxious. Nika should have loathed me, fear me, anything else but this. I would have been able to respond and react to it - the wrath I would have understood and accepted.

"Oh, I think it would be better, however, if you try yet -"
"Please, just tonight."

I looked up to Nika, but his face remained still completely expressionless. It was too dark to see his eyes properly, but it seemed like he hadn`t even blinked them at all. When I said nothing, Nika interpreted  it as affirmative reply. He lifted my blanket and slid next to me on his back. I didn`t dare move, just sit straight like a stick, staring at my hands again.

Awareness of the fact that there was only few inches of air between us made my whole body shudder. I didn`t want to be so close to him, it didn`t feel good. I was afraid that if I accidentally touched his leg, he would understand it immediately wrong, and get frightened.

"Can we sleep now?" Nika whispered, and I could swear my heart skipped beats.

Slowly, trying to avoid any kind of physical contact, I slid back on my back next to Nika. I felt his gaze in myself, and forced myself to close my eyes. The Diapams I hade taken few hours earlier seemed to have lost their effect entirely - there was no longer peace.

If I had thought I had been nervous, it was nothing compared to the panic that struck me when Nika moved. Sofa bed yelp quietly when Nika moved his leg against mine, causing my entire lower body burst into flames. His hand went up to touch lightly my ribs, as to test where they were, and then wrapped it all over my chest. Nika's body was pressed against me softly, stubbornly. I bit my tongue and held my breath when Nika put his face against my neck.

He fell asleep almost immediately. His arm`s grip around me loosened a bit, and breathing became smoother, calmer. Even so, he didn`t let go or turn away from me, no, he was sleeping, wrapped in me, and I even thought I felt his lips curved into a smile - exactly like back then.

I didn`t sleep all night even a minute.