"What if we wouldn`t have to be careful?", Alex asks, and Lucas cries, because it hurts, because it is never going to happen, but mostly because Alex still has the hope. Lucas lost his hope when he watched the little Angel girl die. They were never too careful, always half dead with fear, (even Alex although he refused to admit it), but too stupid to stop. Lucas didn`t count anymore how many times they have sneaked into the city, when he realised he wouldn`t want to know the exact number if they get caught - who would it help if they had managed to do it 160 times before getting caught?
So Lucas stops counting, hopes they will never get caught, and they both cry at the night when they turn 15. If they get caught now... Well, everyone knows what happens to Angels who turn 15 and still aren`t trained. Everyone knows where the feathers to their pillows come from nowadays.
They hold their breath when they are outside, squeeze their hands little too tightly, and Alex, for the first time, cries into Luca`s hair. "I`m scared", he admits, and Lucas doesn`t know what to do. "I`m really scared." Eventually they stop sneaking into the city. They decide it`s far too dangerous, so they hide in their room when they are not needed anywhere else, build a fort for pillows, and play games called what if and imagine if and I wish. Alex doesn`t really cry after these games, but snuggles closer and looks Lucas with a look that prays being hold. So Lucas does. And beneath the wings they pray that someday they don`t have to hide anymore.
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